New Years Kiss
by Mossadartninja
Summary: It's New Years and there is a party on the Navy Yard. This is the same story as A New Years Kiss by CrazyNinjaChicks, so it is set sometime before Judgement Day. I asked them if I could finish their story and they said it was fine, they just don't have time to finish it so I have taken over the job :)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello to all of you who decided to give this a chance. If you have read _A New Years Kiss_ by CrazyNinjaChicks, then this will look very familiar, because it is, you can just skim through it because I have made a few changes, most of them were just edits but some are important.**

**So, go read now!**

**oh yeah, I don't own/ have rights to any of the characters, not even the jackass.**

* * *

Spit-balling

It was New Years Eve and they were stuck doing paper work.

Tony was spit-balling at Ziva… and missing.

Ziva was intent on her work, ignoring the spit-balls sticking to her filing cabinet until one suddenly hit her in the face.

"Tony!" she exclaimed, "Don't you have paperwork to do?"

"Yeah… I get the paper," he picked up a piece, "and I make it work." Ziva dodged the projectile aimed at her head.

"That is disgusting." She shuddered, before going back to work. She wanted to get out and go home.

Quickly loosing interest after that Tony stopped spit-balling and went back to his own seemingly unconquerable paper pile. He had to finish if he wanted to be celebrating in the squad room and not be the only one left at his desk but, being Tony, his attention was quickly diverted again.

"What are you wearing tonight?" he asked Ziva only a few minutes later.

"My pajamas… why?" she asked suspiciously.

"You're joking right? You're gonna wear pj's to the party tonight?" he asked in disbelief. "Your pj's could be sexy though." He added, a smile creeping onto his face.

"What party?" she sighed, putting her pen down because she obviously wasn't going to get work done until Tony was satisfied.

"You're kidding right?" he stared at her in disbelief.

"I do not think I am pregnant, no." She shuddered, "The very thought scares me."

"No I didn't mean… I meant; you didn't get the memo for the New Year Party?"

"No."

"Well our lovely Director Shepard said that she would hold one here. You coming or you got plans?"

"I have a date." Ziva said simply, not even having the chance to finish with _'with my lounge' __because _McGee scoffed. Both Tony and Ziva shot him two very different looks. Ziva's: venomous. Tony's: both of shock and warning.

"I mean…Ziva wouldn't have a date," McGee tried. Tony's eyes grew wider and he swiveled back to face his desk.

"Don't imply that Ziva can't have a date unless you want to die via office appliance, Probie."

"I mean…" he was digging himself a deeper hole. Ziva wouldn't have a date unless that date's name was Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, but he couldn't exactly say that to her face unless he wanted to end up dead. Either way it looked like the same outcome.

"McGee!" Gibbs snapped from over the wall divider. "Abby needs to see you."

When McGee scurried away, Tony, Ziva and Gibbs set determinedly to their work. Ziva muttering what sounded like foreign swear words.

Her email dinged. _You have mail_

**You don't have a date do you?**

She reluctantly typed back. **No**

**So… you coming tonight?**

**I have nothing better to do.**

**Looking forward to the fireworks? We should have a great view from up here.**

**Fireworks?**

**You can't tell me you have never seen fireworks?**

**Do missiles count? They make a big bang and a lot of sparks.**

**These are better… they are noisy, colorful and bright and don't usually end in death.**

**If you want to participate in said party I would suggest that you finish your paperwork.**

**Good point.**

NCIS

Eight o'clock and they were finally able to leave, only because the Director said that Joe the Janitor needed to move everything.

Tony and Ziva took the elevator together down to the parking lot.

"So who you gonna kiss?" Tony asked.

"I would rather kiss Abby's lab floor… to many men on our floor have wandering eyes and not-so-discreet intentions."

"Well you better make up your mind and stand close to them at midnight Zee-vah or elevator eyes here," he pointed at the man on the other side of the elevator, "will be kissing you."

The man got off at the next floor, even though it was wasn't the ground floor. Ziva slapped Tony's arm.

"I know Peter, and his wife Angie, he is a nice guy. Unlike you."

"Excuse me?" Tony scoffed.

"Nothing my little hairy butt. I will see you tonight."

"See you tonight Sweet cheeks." And they both left for their cars.

NCIS

Ziva arrived home in nearly half the time it usually took. She silently congratulated herself and promised herself an extra beer tonight.

She had no idea what she was going to wear and she had been staring at the contents of her wardrobe for an hour. It was nine and the party started at Ten.

She picked up her phone and dialed a familiar number.

_"Abby Scuito."_

_"Hey Abby… it's Ziva."_

NCIS

Abby opened up Ziva's closet door, her eyes popped and her mouth nearly dropped to the floor.

"Ziva David, why haven't I seen you in any of these?" she asked, shocked, indicating the many short, long, split seam and designer dresses in the back of Ziva's wardrobe.

"The opportunity never presented itself." She tried.

"More like you are afraid to show that you can dress in excessive style and get away with it… Can I borrow this?"

"Sure," she shrugged. "I am quite happy in cargo pants and a tank top, thank you. They are so much more practical."

"Well I know someone who thinks you look smoking in jeans and a v-neck top. He'll drop dead if he sees you in this." And she pulled out a little black number.

NCIS

Both Abby and Ziva arrived at NCIS in Ziva's Mini because the hearse got a flat again. Ziva didn't think it was possible to spend an hour to do hair and make-up, but Abby had proved her wrong.

Ziva climbed out of the passenger's side awkwardly. The dress was tight, very tight, she could believe Abby had convinced her to wear it. Unless she undid the zipper running from her knee to her hip which was especially designed to show off her right thigh, she had a feeling she wouldn't be able to move, but she was going to hold off on doing that for as long a possible.

Abby on the other hand, climbed out easily in a v-neck red dress that moved effortlessly around her hips and thighs. She had left her platforms at home and replaced them with a pair of flashy black stilettos that didn't exactly match her dress, but it appeared she could care less. She had left her black dress with the skull trim at Ziva's after she had found the red dress.

Abby couldn't help but admire the way that Ziva handled herself in heels, never having seen her in them very often.

"Shall we go?" Abby asked. They could hear the music coming from inside and they could see flashing, colored lights too.

"The Director outdid herself." Ziva commented as they walked towards the building.

"You know her… in for a penny in for a pound."

"What?"

"Never mind. Come on we're missing the party."


	2. Chapter 2

The Beginning of Something Huge

As soon as the elevator doors opened they were hit by the pounding music. If Ziva hadn't been accustomed to Abby's music she may have clapped her hands over her ears. Abby on the other hand didn't seem to notice the elevated volume.

The two women were greeted by wolf whistles and jeers spurred on by alcohol and the festive atmosphere.

McGee and Tony caught them first. They had been waiting by the elevator for them to arrive. The two men didn't know what they were expecting, but what they got was certainly was more than they thought.

McGee was the first one able to pry his jaw loose from the floor.

"Wow Abs. You look… fantastic. What did you do to your hair?" he asked, still gob-smacked. Abby played with the pigtail tied below her left ear.

"It was Ziva's idea."

"You look great too Ziva," McGee added but his attention never really left Abby, "want to dance?" he asked her, proud that he wasn't the nervous one here.

"Sure. What did Joe do to the squad room?" All the desks had been moved to the walls, leaving a massive dance floor.

Tony still hadn't said a word and his eyes hadn't left Ziva.

"You look nice Tony." She supplied, taking in his dark jeans and dress shirt he looked casually smart.

That got no response.

She undid the zipper at her leg, trying to get something out of him.

_At least now I can move._

"How far up can that go?" Tony asked, his eyes glued to her hips.

"That far. The Director can throw quite a party, yes?"

"Yeah. You should see what she's wearing. Nowhere near as good anymore, not compared to you." His eyes found her face. "You left your hair down… and you straightened it… it looks nice." Ziva smiled, feeling like that her ridiculous dress was suddenly worth it.

"Do you want to get a drink?" he asked.

"Yeah sure. Where is the food?"

"With the booze, by the cubicles."

NCIS

An attractive agent had convinced Ziva to dance with him, McGee and Abby were dancing together, Tony was playing a drinking game with a group of agents they had worked with once before. Jimmy had mysteriously disappeared and so had Michelle Lee. Ducky was entertaining a group of children that had been mistakenly brought along.

By this time the dancing was becoming increasingly raunchy as the night grew later and alcohol consumption grew. All the while Jenny and Gibbs were upstairs, supervising the party and talking with each other.

The whole party was becoming inappropriate and there were more than a few unguarded comments. A lot of agents had gone home, unwilling to wait till midnight for that kiss.

"-and then Fornell asked-"

"Just a minute Jen." Gibbs interrupted as an older agent started bellowing out one of his sex stories. Gibbs hurried downstairs and asked Ducky to take the remaining four children down to Abby's lab while everyone gathered around and laughed at the outrageous story being told in graphic detail.

Karaoke was raging. Tony and McGee pushed a couple of desks together for a makeshift stage and hauled a breathless Ziva on top of it.

"I don't know how." She complained as Tony passed her the mic.

"Just read the lyrics and sing with the song."

Abby shut off the main music and everyone was focused on an oblivious Ziva. Abby started the song as Tony gave her the thumbs up.

Ziva was bopping lightly with the song, she seemed to vaguely now it.

"Half past twelve  
And I'm watching the late show in my flat all alone  
How I hate to spend the evening on my own"

Tony was shocked at Ziva's voice… she could sing… really well.

It was like a live performance, everyone started dancing again. Tony climbed up onto the desks and took Ziva's hand.

"Autumn winds  
Blowing outside the window as I look around the room  
And it makes me so depressed to see the phone"

Ziva twirled under Tony's arm and continued to dance and sing.

"There's not a soul out there  
No one to hear my prayer"

Everyone cheered as the chorus came up.

"Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight  
Won't somebody help me chase these shadows away  
Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight  
Take me through the darkness to the break of the day"

Abby switched the main music back on and Tony helped Ziva down. Together they finished Abba's Gimme Gimme Gimme before Ziva was swept away by another man.

Tony sat on the makeshift stage, swinging his feet like a little kid. McGee sat down next to him.

"Where's Abby?" Tony asked.

"She wants to be the new DJ so the current one wants to go home."

"Ah."

"You want to dance with Ziva don't you?"

"No!"

"Well you haven't stopped staring at her all night."

"She looks **_hot_** McGee!"

"She is more than a hot woman is a sexy dress to you Tony." And he jumped off in search of another beer.

"Yeah… maybe…" Tony whispered. Watching Ziva flaunt her moves to Santana's _Into the Night_. It was really starting to turn him on. Everybody moved away, creating a circle around the Israeli.

_"Like a gift from the heavens, it was easy to tell,  
It was love from above, that could save me from hell.  
She had fire in her soul it was easy to see,  
How the devil himself could be pulled out of me,_

_There were drums in the air as she started to dance,  
Every soul in the room keeping time with their hands,"_

Tony started to clap his hands together with the beat, everyone followed suit.

"And we sang...  
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
And the voices rang like the angels sang,  
Singing...  
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
And we danced on into the night,  
Ay oh ay oh  
And we danced on into the night,  
Like a piece to the puzzle that falls into place,  
You could tell how we felt from the look on our faces"

Ziva was spinning in circles, her hands above her head, the lasers flashing in her bright eyes.

"She was spinning in circles with the moon in our eyes,"

Tony jumped off the stage and pushed through the circle, grabbed Ziva's waist and spun her to face him. She looked at him, shocked for a moment before her face broke into a broad grin. They were so close. Close enough to feel each other's breath on their lips. The world around them was a blur. It was just them in a swirl of color and music, their eyes locked together.

_"No room left to move between you and I,  
We forgot where we were and we lost track of time,  
And we sang to the wind as we danced through the night,  
And we sang..._

Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
And the voices rang like the angels sing,  
We`re singing.  
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
And we danced on into the night,  
Ay oh ay oh

_And we danced on into the night,  
Ay oh ay oh  
And we danced on into the night,"_

When Santana's solo came up, everyone cheered and egged on Tony and Ziva's fast dancing, jeering and calling, even a few wolf whistles from other envious agents.

"Like a gift from the heavens, it was easy to tell,  
It was love from above, that could save me from hell,  
She had fire in her soul it was easy to see,  
And the devil himself could be pulled out of me,  
There were drums in the air as she started to dance,  
Every soul in the room keeping time with their hands,  
And we sang...

_Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
And the voices rang like the angels sing,  
We`re singing...  
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
And we danced on into the night,  
Ay oh ay oh ay,  
Ay oh ay oh  
And we danced on into the night,  
And the voices bang like the angels sing,  
Ay oh ay oh,  
Ay oh ay oh,  
And we danced on into the night,  
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
Ay oh ay oh,  
Ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
Ay oh ay oh,  
Singing ay oh ay oh ay oh ay,  
Ay oh ay oh,  
And we danced on into the night."_

Tony surprised Ziva with a dip, she instinctively wrapped her leg around his waist to keep from falling, making the finish all the more intimate. She couldn't help but laugh as he pulled her back up.

Tony couldn't help but savor the feel of her leg around his waist, so close. They were breathing heavy as the song ended and DJ Abby started a much slower song, U2, _All I Want Is You._

Tony put his hand in the small of her back and grasped her hand in the other. They danced together slowly, her head on his shoulder, his head on hers. Ziva closed her eyes but Tony kept his wide open, not wanting to close them in case this was just a dream, it was too perfect to be just a dream.

Suddenly everyone started counting down.

"10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…"

"All I want is you," Ziva muttered against Tony chest, the music keeping him from actually hearing her.

Tony and Ziva looked up and slowly closed the gap between their lips.

"…1! HAPPY NEW YEAR!" But two people didn't shout with them.

McGee pecked Abby's cheek lightly up in the DJ box. She turned, grabbed his tie and pulled his lips to hers.

Up by MTAC Gibbs and Jen were much the same.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: even if you've read this story before I suggest you read this, I made it longer because my mind is filthy.**

* * *

Somehow, breaking all laws of science, Tony and Ziva found their way to the elevator joined at the mouth, forgetting that they needed oxygen.

Tony freed his hand from Ziva's hair for a second to fumble for the down button. They nearly fell in when the doors opened and Tony slammed Ziva up against the wall, she didn't even whimper just wrapped her legs around his waist.

The doors opened again and Jenny and Gibbs got in much the same way as their two agents.

Tony scrambled to let Ziva down and Gibbs cleared his throat… Ziva smoothed her hair down and Jen dabbed her mouth before they all stood in awkward silence.

"We'll take my car." Jenny whispered as the doors opened at the car park.

Gibbs held the door open and turned to his senior agent and liaison officer, "I didn't see anything if you two didn't."

"Not a thing boss." Tony agreed.

"Of course." Ziva confirmed before murmuring, "nice lip stick… did Jen recommend it?"

"Tonight… this morning", he corrected, "there is no rule #12." He slapped their heads.

"In advance." He explained, then rushed out after the director.

"Autopsy?"

"Too cold. Abby's lab, she has a futon."

"Her and McGee though."

"Coffin or McGee's Porsche. Looks comfy."

They were both impatient, not even using full sentences, four years of unresolved sexual tension was finally taking it's toll.

"Abby's lab." They agreed before Tony attached his mouth to Ziva's once more.

NCIS

Lips locked together, they stumbled in Abby's office, turning on her music hastily as they went.

Caught in the moment; they didn't notice Ducky leave with an armful of children.

Kiss blared through Abby's lab.

_Tonight, I wanna give it all to you_

_In the darkness_

_There's so much I wanna do_

_And tonight, I wanna lay it at your feet_

_Cause girl I was made for you_

_Cause girl you were made for me_

_I was made for loving you baby_

_You were made for loving me_

"I was made for loving you Ziva David."

Tony buried his face in the crook of Ziva's neck as he began sucking at the soft skin below her ear. She was impossibly sweet and soft and the delicious scent of her shampoo attacked his nose. Every nerve in his brain on high alert as he expertly tortured her.

Ziva moaned and tilted her head to the side as Tony sucked and nipped gently at the tender skin there, certain to leave one hell of a hickey. Tony moved further down until the material of her dress interrupted his descent. He growled in frustration and searched for a zipper at her back. He found it and yanked, then proceeded in removing the unnecessary inconvenience from Ziva's body. In his opinion, clothes were a waste of time.

He trailed kisses down along her collarbone to her breast and nestled there, teasing and taunting with his tongue and his fingers. Ziva moaned and squirmed beneath him before convulsing her body and flipping Tony beneath her.

"You have too many clothes on," she gasped, and started to literally tear his clothes from his body, Tony helping her as much as he could. When she had removed his pants, Tony reclaimed top position and started teasing again.

"Tony…" Ziva whined. "Screw foreplay," she hissed and took the reins. Tony had the air knocked out of him as she flipped him again.

"You are so fucking hot," he groaned, tangling his fingers in her hair and pulling her down on him. She moaned and ground her covered core against his hard-on. He roughly gripped her thong and yanked, the thin piece of fabric ripping easily with his lust filled adrenalin.

"Hey," she scolded, pulling back to look down at him. "That was my only thong."

"Go figure," he laughed, rolling them over again. He kissed her again, his tongue chasing hers as he teased her with his tip.

"Tony," she whined against his mouth, " I said no foreplay." She felt him smile as he slowly entered her. They both groaned at the feeling of being united for the first time, and they just sat there for a second. After a short moment through Tony pulled out again slowly, making Ziva _whimper._ Tony could believe what he was hearing, and he wanted to hear it again. He thrust back into her before quickly backing out again.

"Tony," she cried softly, her hands snaking around his neck.

"I love those noises you're making, Ziva," he whispered in her ear as he continued at his tormenting pace.

"Please, Tony, harder. Fuck me harder," she begged, locking her legs behind her back. He did, because frankly, this slow pace was killing him too.

"Tony," she mewed as she felt the pressure building inside of her. Her nails digging into his back urging him on, telling him to let go and that, combined with her soft mutterings in his ear and the feel of her velvety walls closing around him pushed him over the edge.

"Ziva," he groaned as he spilled into her. They stayed in that position for a second before Tony rolled off of her and she curled into his side. They lay panting on Abby's floor while Aerosmith played a mellow song in the background.

I _could stay awake just to hear you breathing,__  
__Watch you smile while you are sleeping,__  
__While you are far away and dreaming,__  
__I could spend my life in this sweet surrender,__  
__I could stay lost in this moment forever,__  
__Where a moment spent with you is a moment I treasure,_

Tony felt Ziva's eyes flutter shut against his chest but he fought off his own drowsiness, the song said everything for him.

_I don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep,__  
__Cause I miss you baby, And I don't want to miss a thing,__  
__Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do,__  
__I still miss you baby and I don't want to miss a thing_

He didn't want to fall asleep and wake up to find that it was only a dream. He would take up Gibbs' coffee habit if it meant Ziva was his forever.

_Lying close to you feeling your heart beating,__  
__And I wondering what you are dreaming,__  
__Wondering if it's me you are seeing,__  
__Then I kiss your eyes and thank god we're together,__  
__I just want to stay with you in this moment forever and forever forever_

_And I don't want to miss one smile,__  
__I don't want to miss one kiss,__  
__I just want to be with you right here with you,__  
__Just like this, I just want to hold you close,__  
__I feel your heart so close to mine__  
__And just stay here in this moment,__  
__For all of the rest of time_

But the alcohol, dancing, singing, excitement and sex took it's toll and his closed his eyes with his arms wrapped around Ziva, with such a strong and tender hold that said he would never let her go.

_I don't want to close my eyes, I don't want to fall asleep,__  
__Cause I miss you baby, And I don't want to miss a thing,_

NCIS

When Ziva woke up she nearly burst into tears. For years she had strived not to let this happen. Not to become just another notch in Tony's bedpost.

They had both been drinking, but she hadn't drunk more than a couple of glasses of wine and that long neck she had promised herself. It was a spur of the moment night. What was she thinking? Tony didn't want her.

She carefully lifted Tony's arms off of her and quietly redressed before leaving.

If this had been a one-night stand then it had never happened. Tony would be too drunk to remember anyway. This was all just a mistake.

When Tony woke up a few minutes later, he found Ziva's side of the bed empty. Maybe it was just a dream but he could have sworn that she was there beside him when he fell asleep.

_It had to be a dream… I mean, why would Ziva want me when she has hundreds of other guys eating out of her hand?_

Tony grabbed his clothes, dressed quickly and left for his car, a plan hatching in his mind.

Who needed Valentines Day to send someone flowers?


	4. Chapter 4

In Tony's ridiculous writing on his bedside table was a plan…

**January 1****st**

_* Find Ziva's favorite flowers._

_* Find Abby's florist_

_* Order 42 flowers and write notes_

_* Give 1 flower and 1 note to Ziva until Valentines Day._

_(note to self, get Sarah to write the notes.)_

It was January 1st- time to set his plan in motion.

He finished adjusting his hair, grabbed his keys and headed to his car. Just because it was the 1st of January didn't mean he got the day off. At least he didn't have a hangover, he hadn't drunk much at all. He chuckled darkly to himself, McGee and Abby would be hammered.

NCIS

Ziva was stressing big time. One night, that was all it took for her life to be turned upside down.

She loved her job, she loved her home, she loved her team and she loved America, but most of all she loved Tony DiNozzo. And that could cause her to lose everything.

NCIS

"Paper work? More!" Tony screeched.

"Just shut up and do it DiNozzo." Ziva snapped.

"This is the worst friggin' New Year's ever." Tony grumbled before plopping down behind his desk.

"I'm going for coffee… do you two want anything?" Gibbs announced.

"No." they both answered.

Gibbs disappeared into the break room and McGee walked in wearing sunglasses.

"What did you over bleach your eyes this time McClean?"

"Why are you always so childish?" Ziva snapped again, loudly.

"Hey keep it down." McGee croaked, laying down behind his desk and pulling a coat over his head.

"Hangover McLateNight?"

McGee just groaned an affirmative.

Ziva didn't understand… Tony seemed to be in perfect health and she hadn't seen the famous and disgusting DiNozzo hangover remedy. Tony hadn't been drunk… this made things so much harder.

Gibbs came back, coffee in hand, and saw McGee on the floor. He immediately looked at Ziva but then saw that he was breathing.

Tony and Ziva cringed in preparation but the yelling never came. Instead he knelt down and gently tapped McGee's shoulder and put his coffee on the floor.

"Drink this." He put a bottle of water next to the coffee, "and this." He tossed a bottle of painkillers beside him too, "and take these. Should have stayed home Tim." He got up and returned to the direction he had just come from, but instead he climbed the stairs to the director's office

"Is it just me or is he acting nice." McGee groaned, peering out from under his coat.

"It's amazing what a good night can do." Tony grinned.

"My night doesn't feel so great now."

"So… did you and Abby… get it on?"

"Yeah…What about you two? How was your 'kiss'?"

Tony immediately spun his chair back, Ziva had never looked up but had been listening intently.

"Ziva?" she picked up the closet thing that wasn't connected to something and hurled it at McGee.

McGee ducked the gold wrapped gift and picked it up.

"Ziva you might want this back." And he tossed it to her.

Ziva ignored it, even as it tumbled onto her keyboard.

"Aren't you going to open it?" Tony asked.

Still she ignored it.

"I'm gonna visit Abby. McGee come with."

When both agents were gone Ziva picked up her gift. It was wrapped in gold paper and silver ribbon with a small tag fastened to the bow.

All it read was…

_If I had to choose between loving you and breathing… I would use my last breath to say; I love you._

_Ziva David, thank you for last night._

She pulled the ribbon off and ripped the paper away. Inside were a pack of chocolate truffles, her favorite chocolate. Another piece of paper was lodged in the box.

_What are you favorite flowers?_

She had no idea. She had never received flowers but she did like roses… red roses. She hastily scribbled, _Red Roses_ on the back of the card and left the card on her desk. Just as Tony came back into the bullpen he saw Ziva tuck his box of chocolates into her drawer.

He had a mission…

And phase one was complete.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I thought I had gotten this across, but the first 11 chapters are by CrazyNinjaChicks, I mostly did some editing and made sure it flowed. I will accept your complements after chapter 12**

* * *

The elevator doors dinged open and the sound broke the silence like a warning bell.

It was dark in the squad room, with only the moon streaming through the skylight to light the way to Ziva's desk.

He had seen her leave the card next to her computer, all he had to do was grab it and get out. Why the hell was he so damned nervous?

It was there, a little sliver of white. He grabbed it, shoved it in his pocket and headed back to the elevator.

He bolted for his car and jumped in, he fumbled in his pocket for the card.

_Keys_? No.

_Gum_? No.

Keys again. "Son of a bitch!" He emptied his pockets onto the seat and picked up the card.

In Ziva's perfect, no-nonsense writing: _Red Roses_

Red roses, ha. How original. Tony smirked to himself.

Phase two set in motion.

NCIS

Ziva was at her desk, intent on her work and ignoring him.

Tony dropped his bag at his desk and kept walking, making his way to Abby's lab.

"Hey Abby!" He yelled over the music, he stopped and sniffed, something smelt like gunpowder and lavender.

"Abby?" he asked when she turned the volume down.

"Hey Tony. We don't have an active case… why did you come down to see me?"

"I need your help or rather advice… why does your lab smell like…"

"Sex?"

"Gunpowder."

"Because when I came in today my lab smelt like sex."

Tony shifted uncomfortably for a moment before Abby broke the silence.

"What did you want help with again?"

"What florist do you use? you know, black roses and all."

"Oh, special lady?"

"Very special."

"How old is this one?"

"27"

"Tony, they are getting older!"

"Yeah, well people do that, and I can't wait too long or she'll get away."

Abby scribbled down an address on a post it note and stuck it to his forehead.

"Thanks Abs."

"Tell me how it goes." She called after him.

"You'll know before I do."

Abby pulled a puzzled face then shrugged and picked up Bert.

"I wish McGee would give me flowers."

NCIS

"I'm going to get lunch. Do you two want anything while I am out?" Ziva asked, her gaze shifting between Gibbs and McGee. She had finally snapped. Tony had been staring at her for hours and it was really starting to unnerve her, and she couldn't tell him to stop because she was trying to ignore him.

"Hey! What about me?" Tony yelped. She didn't even acknowledge that he had said anything.

Gibbs could practically feel the tension between his two agents and he had a feeling that it had something to do with New Year's early, early morning.

But they had looked very, very pleased with themselves in the elevator… what had changed?

_They had sex Gibbs_! His head replied.

"Oi!" he shouted, interrupting the two bickering agents. "You two, my office now."

Ziva immediately walked towards the elevator. Tony noticed that she was limping slightly.

"DiNozzo! Stop staring at her ass and get in here."

Tony scrambled to the 'office'.

Gibbs flipped the switch and turned to the two agents.

"What happened?"

"Everything" Tony.

"Nothing" Ziva.

"And this is why you are ignoring him?"

"No" Ziva.

"Yes" Tony.

"Do you want a moment to get your stories straight?"

"No" both.

"Good. We finally agree on something."

No answer.

"I don't know what happened, I don't want to know, but this affecting your ability to work so it is my problem now too. You can beat the crap out of each other as soon as you step out of the Navy yard, but while you are here you are partners and I need you to act like them. Now you are not leaving until your fix your problem."

Gibbs sat in the corner and pulled out his iPod. It only had five songs, but if this went for longer than he expected he could replay them. He turned the volume all the way up, he really did not want to hear this conversation but he needed to make sure they both came out in one piece.

Tony glanced at his boss. He could hear the music- Whiskey Lullaby- how Gibbs.

"I don't want to talk about it." Ziva said quickly.

"Neither do I." _Yes I do_ "But at least pretend we figured this out."

"Fine."

"You're limping…did I hurt you?"

"No Tony."

"Then why?"

"I nearly rolled my ankle jogging this morning."

"Oh."

"Listen Tony… I… I didn't want to be like all the other girls… just a one-night stand. I held out for years Tony… but one touch and it all came undone because I was not in control, because you made me lose myself… no one has _ever_ done that."

"I thought you didn't want to talk about it."

"I didn't… see? You get things out of me."

"So are we fixed?"

"No." she kissed him softly, quickly, and flicked the switch.

"Now?"

"No."


	6. Chapter 6

Tony walked into the bullpen with a rose and a note. No one else was there.

"Roses, roses, roses," he hummed, "roses, roses, roses."

He put it on Ziva's desk, took one last look at the note, and left.

"I might go get a coffee for 20 minutes."

NCIS

When he pulled into his parking space half and hour later Ziva's Mini was already there.

Phase four complete, now repeat.

**_Flashback:_**

_The bells above the door jingled. He really hated shops with bells._

_"Hi." Said a bright eyed lady from behind the counter. She tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder and smiled at him. Any other time he would have flirted but he was on a mission and he only and one woman on his mind._

_"Can I help you?"_

_"Yeah maybe. Can I preorder about 40 roses please?" he asked, forgetting the number he had written on the piece of paper beside his bed._

_"40?"_

_"Yeah one for each day until Valentines. I'll probably need more for then…"_

_"Special lady?"_

_"Guy." He replied casually._

_"Umm… okay…" she said uneasily._

_"How much is this gonna cost me?"_

_"Quite a bit." She grimaced._

**_End flashback:_**

Tony ruffled his hair and slightly untucked his shirt so it looked like he had just gotten out of bed.

He walked into the squad room with bleary eyes.

"Late night DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked.

"No, guys above me. Hey Ziva who is your admirer?"

"I do not know they did not leave a name… only a note."

"Yeah? What does it say?"

"When you are in love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams."

"Poetic."

"Very."

"Sounds like McMushy's free writing. Any idea who sent it?"

"No, but it is beautiful."

NCIS

Everyday Tony would stop at the florist, pick up his rose, put the card from his pocket in amongst the baby's breath and blood red petals, put it on Ziva's desk and left again for coffee. And everyday he couldn't help but grin at the smile that broke out across Ziva's face every morning when she found a rose on her desk.

She had kept every one of the notes that the mysterious 'Romeo' had given her.

On her bedside table, so she was smiling when she went to sleep and woke up.

_Some of the greater things in life are unseen that's why you close your eyes when you kiss, cry, or dream..._

_Pleasure of love lasts but a moment, Pain of love lasts a lifetime._

_Falling in love is awfully simple, but falling out of love is simply awful._

On her refrigerator, so it was still there when she came home from work or left in the morning.

_I get the best feeling in the world when you say hi or even smile at me because I know, even if its just for a second, that I've crossed your mind._

_I don't know why they call it heartbreak. It feels like every part of my body is broken too._

_If hate is such a strong word, then why do we toss around love like it's nothing?_

On her table, so she could read it when she grabbed her keys.

_Just because somebody doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have._

_Sometimes your nearness takes my breath away; and all the things I want to say can find no voice. Then, in silence, I can only hope my eyes will speak my heart._

_The ones that you love the most are usually the ones that hurt you the most._

_And her favorite was taped to her computer, so she never forgot it when she left every night._

Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away, and going away means forgetting, and I never want to forget you.

She recognized the first three lines from _Peter Pan,_ but she knew the last part was special for her.

It was the 13th of February and the roses were still coming, everyday with a different love note. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate what the person was doing but she wanted to know who it was. Unless she wanted to be camping out at her desk she would need Abby's help.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: sorry I didn't update yesterday, I had to work late and then it started storming. But you get two chapters today instead :)**

"Abby can you help me with something?"

"Sure."

"Can you see who is sending me flowers?"

"It depends…"

"They put them on my desk every morning."

"Oh! Easy."

"But this is free time snooping." Ziva warned, "Cases first."

"Of course."

"Thanks Abby… put a Caff-Pow on my tab."

Abby watched Ziva leave and then it hit her.

Tony was giving Ziva roses! That's why he wanted the florist!

Tomorrow was Valentines Day. Tony had held out this long, she couldn't ruin it with one day left to go.

She picked up her phone and started pulling cords out of her computer and even put a band aid on 'major mass spec'.

"Officer David." Came the typical answer.

"Ziva it is Abby… We have a problem."

"And…"

"My computers have broken down, and I can't scan the security tapes until the 16th.

NCIS

It was 06:00 and Tony had been up for over an hour, it was probably a good thing.

He was in front of his mirror, doing his hair, ruffling it and then trying to redo it in a different style.

He had slicked it back, spiked it up, parted it to the side and now he had played with it so much he was back to square one, looking like he had just gotten out of bed. Ziva's comment came to mind, "_Your hair is sticking up like a Porcuswine. No, wrong word, porcu… pig…porcu… the little animal with the spikies?_

_"Porcupine?_

_"Porcupine! Yes!"_

He liked the way she messed up her words and confused her idioms, he liked seeing her cute frustration when she got it wrong and he loved being able to correct her… it was his job.

He looked out the window. It was raining. He shrugged his coat on, leaving his hair as it was, the rain would screw it up anyway.

He grabbed his keys and walked through the pouring water to his car, cursing his apartment block for not having a sheltered parking lot.

NCIS

He pulled up outside the florist like he had every morning for the past 43 days.

"Hey Tony." The blonde woman greeted cheerily.

"Hi Amy. You got my stuff."

"Yep." She ducked into the back room, returning with his massive bouquet. "Even for Valentines Day this is a big order, you must really like this lady."

Tony had long since told Amy that he was indeed giving roses to a woman and not a man.

"Oh yeah. How much this time?"


	8. Chapter 8

As usual Abby's lab was flooded with black and red. Roses sprouted from the most unlikely places and her desks were covered in novelty hearts and stuffed bears and the Chicki-baby was sitting contentedly beside Gibbs' love heart straw Caf-Pow!

And as usual Ziva's desk was empty. Well… there were two roses sitting beside her computer, the red rose was from the agent that she had danced with and a yellow rose that McGee had pulled out of his bouquet from Abby because he felt sorry for her.

Ziva never got flowers on Valentines Day. She always declared that it was a stupid holiday that gave florists and chocolate shops a life but it stung when year after year her desk was continually empty. Even her anonymous Romeo had failed to leave his daily gift.

Every girl liked to get flowers, even Mossad assassins.

Ziva sighed gloomily as she searched through her email, hoping for a virtual rose and love note… Nothing.

Tony looked up and was surprised when he saw sadness etched all over her face.

"Hey?" he asked softly, "What's up?"

She shook her head like always and said, "Nothing I am fine." She didn't even look up.

"Your mouth is saying the words but your eyes don't agree. You know what? I'll be back in five."

He snatched his keys from his drawer, left his desk and bolted to the elevator. He pounded on the down button but it wasn't fast enough so he took the stairwell. He tripped down the steps and fumbled in his pocket for his keys. He unlocked the back door and snatched the roses from the leather seat.

Tony scrambled up the stairs leading to the elevator and pushed the button. It opened almost immediately and he jumped in. He steadied his breathing and slicked back his messy hair just as the doors opened again. He tiptoes quietly up to the divider behind Ziva's desk, ignoring the looks he was getting from other agents.

"Hey David." He whispered over her wall, keeping the roses out of sight.

Ziva looked at him for the first time that morning.

"Tony your hair… it is-."

"Porcupine. I know but don't worry about my hair, worry about these." And he lifted the bouquet over the divider and handed them to her.

One black rose in a bed of red ones, surrounded by white baby's breath.

Ziva couldn't help it, she gasped.

"Oh Tony they are beautiful." She gushed, reaching out to take the bouquet.

"Just like you," he told her with a brood smile on his face. There was a note, a sliver if white against the red. Ziva didn't even need to read it.

"Tony it was you!" she exclaimed, "You gave me the…" Ziva went very quiet.

"Hey are you okay?" Tony asked, worrying as she turned pale.

Ziva got up abruptly and fled the bullpen. Tony ran after her, just missing her as she disappeared into the bathroom.

Tony paced back and forth like a caged tiger.

"Oh screw it!" he pushed open the door, after all she had done it to him.

He could hear her retching in the far cubicle. The door wasn't locked and it wasn't even closed.

He was shocked to see Ziva, **_Ziva_**, huddled over the toilet, completely helpless as she emptied her stomach.

Overcoming his initial shock; Tony pulled her hair away from her face and rubbed soothing circles on her back with the palm of his hand.

Ziva coughed a few times and he felt her muscles tense again but she pushed past him and went to the sink to splash her face and rinse her mouth.

"Doesn't your make up run?" Tony asked casually.

"Do not wear any," she croaked.

"Is my giving you flowers so shocking it made you throw up?"

"No, I do not know why… must have eaten something bad."

"Or you could be pregnant." Tony put out. Ziva laughed.

"I do not think so." She wiped her face and took Tony's hand.

"The roses are beautiful. Thank you." She kissed his cheek.

"Just like you" he kissed her lips. She kissed back for a moment before she pulled away. "You sleeping with me was not a mistake was it?"

"No."

A soft smile graced her face before she left Tony alone in the middle of the ladies room.

NCIS

"You ok Ziva?" Gibbs asked when she returned to her desk.

"I am fine."

"You sure? You look sick"

"I am fine." She repeated.

"Go home."

"Really Gibbs I am fine."

"Wasn't a suggestion David."

"Fine, but I was not about to comply."

Gibbs shook his head in frustration.

"At least get something to eat," at that moment Tony walked into sight, "DiNozzo go with her."


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: hey so I'm going away on a summer trip tomorrow and won't be updating until Monday, this goes for all of my other stories too :)**

* * *

"So… what do you want to eat?" Tony asked, slinging an arm around Ziva's shoulders. She shivered back her guilt.

"I am not hungry. Do you want to get a coffee instead?"

"Since when do you like coffee?"

"The coffee is for you." She laughed, snuggling deeper into his embrace as they walked along the sidewalk.

"We'll go to Starbucks. That way I can force a muffin down your throat too." He couldn't help but feel that something was wrong with his invincible ninja and he unconsciously tightened his arm around her.

"Are you sure you're ok Ziva?"

"Yes Tony."

"It isn't like you to just, literally 'spill your guts'. I remember when you waited all day to go home and take an aspirin so Gibbs wouldn't send you home."

"I can not control my organs Tony."

"Sometimes you can."

"Like what?" she exclaimed, stopping.

Tony stopped and examined her adorable face, her light smile and dancing eyes, waiting for his response.

"Your heart."

"Tony…" she warned, casting her eyes down.

"Ziva just… shush. Okay? I can't get you out of my head, you don't know what it did to me to go to bed with you and wake up with your side empty. I was afraid to go to sleep, afraid that it would all be a dream, that you would not be there when I woke up. Looks like my instincts were right."

"Tony what are you saying?" Ziva's chocolate eyes flicking around his face.

"That I would like nothing more than to go to bed with you every night and wake up with you there still." He said gripping her shoulders gently.

"Tony…" she warned again.

"Hey, I'm not saying I want to marry you right here and now, I'm not saying I will marry you if you don't want to I just want to… be with you."

"Tony… I… I can't." Ziva whispered, tears springing to her eyes, knowing that she was about to make a huge mistake.

"Why not?" Tony asked, nothing but confusion filling his gorgeous green eyes.

"Ziva?" A voice asked. Tony turned around to see a man that looked very much like himself. "Sweet heart is that you?"

"Lucas." Ziva exclaimed, a fake smile plastered on her face. The man, Lucas, grabbed her shoulders and gently massaged them before looping his arms around her small, perfect waist.

Ziva was suddenly deeply immersed in the sidewalk.

"Who is this, darling?" Lucas asked.

"This is Anthony DiNozzo, he is my partner at work" she mumbled.

"Ah… the famous DiNozzo." He said, shaking Tony's hand enthusiastically. Tony stuffed his hand back in his jacket pocket and proceeded to wipe it on the lining, "I've heard a lot about you, it makes me jealous when she comes home and all I hear is Tony did this and Tony said that. Tony broke his nose, he is so childish… but she always comes through the door with a smile on her face. I hope you take good care of her."

"I wouldn't see a dog jump at her." Tony could only reply.

"Could I steal her for lunch?" Lucas asked, smiling.

"Sure, I should get back anyway." He could see guilt and sadness all over his ninja's face.

"Lucas I am sorry but I really need to get back to the office… I have a lot of paperwork to finish."

Tony only just stopped himself from saying that they had no paperwork.

"Valentines Day and I don't even get to show my beautiful girl off." Lucas smiled.

_GIRL?_Tony's head screamed,_Ziva was a hell of a woman! Not a girl._

"I'll see you tonight my love." Ziva mumbled.

"I look forward to it sweet heart." Lucas grinned and winked at Tony.

Tony held back his shudder, an image of Ziva and her boyfriend doing the horizontal tango came to mind.

Lucas pulled her closer and kissed her soundly. Tony couldn't help but notice how unresponsive she was. Ziva pulled away first.

"I will see you tonight." She repeated and smiled weakly.

"You look pale… are you sick?"

**_YOU ARE ONLY NOTICING THIS NOW!_** Tony wanted to scream.

"I am fine."

"See you later then. Nice to meet you Tony."

"Yeah, you too."

"Paper work?" Tony asked when Lucas disappeared.

"I do not want to talk about it."

"Sometimes talking helps."

"Not this time."

"Where did you find him? England?"

"He was born in England yes."

"I make you smile?" Tony teased, nudging a smile onto her own face, "Come on Ziva talk to me."

She started to walk away. Tony grabbed her wrist and spun her around. She glared at him for a minute then sobbed and hugged him tightly.

Tony staggered back and stood frozen in confusion before he reclaimed Ziva as his and wrapped his arms around her waist and planted a kiss on her head. He held her gently until her sobs receded.

"What's wrong Ziva?"

"I found…" she sniffed, "a… ring." She cried into his jacket, Tony's jaw and heart dropped.

"An engagement ring?"

Ziva just nodded against his chest.

"Why are you crying sweet cheeks? You should be happy."

"I d-do not w-want to." She sobbed. "I j-just wanted t-to come home t-to someone and h-have them c-care about me."

"So you don't want to marry Lucas?" Tony asked, just wanting to be clear. Ziva shook her head.

"Sweet cheeks I care about you. You know that right?"

"You have a funny way of showing it." She sniffed.

"You scare me what can I say?"

Ziva gave a watery laugh and wiped her nose on the back of her hand.

"All better?"

"He will still ask me." She pointed out glumly.

"You never had to say yes."

"It is Valentines day. It will break his heart."

"You said Valentines day is stupid and it will break your heart to say yes."

"Why do you care so much?"

"The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else."

"You love me? Tony DiNozzo? The man of one night stands?"

"The very same."

"Tony come on. We could not do this even if we wanted to."

"You keep saying 'we' when you should be saying 'you'."

"Tony I am not talking about this." Ziva objected.

"Why not?"

"I am not arguing with you!"

"Yes you are."

"No I am not."

"Yes you are."

"No I-." her words were cut off as Tony sealed his lips over hers.

Ziva moaned deep in her throat and kissed him back, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Tony's heart roared in his chest and his arms went around her. After several minutes they broke apart with a wet pop.

"You didn't kiss Lucas like that." Tony smiled. Ziva shushed him with a finger against his lips.

"Just stop." She smiled and kissed him again.

"Why… do you… like… him?" Tony asked between kisses.

"He has a… big… red… Ferrari."

That very car in question cruised past the pair at that very moment, and neither noticed the car, or the horror struck owner.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: hey friends, I'm back from the wilderness basically in one piece. New chapters for (almost) all my other stories should be up sometime tomorrow, depends on how fast I feel like typing**

* * *

Ziva dropped her bag at the door, fumbled the key into the lock and twisted. The door clicked open and she shouldered it inwards, kicking her bag over the threshold and keeping the massive bouquet of roses from being damaged.

"Lucas?" she called, "Where are you?"

"Kitchen." Came the low answer.

Ziva laid her roses on the coffee table and proceeded to her kitchen.

Lucas was hunched over the bench top, staring out the window with an open bottle of wine beside his white fist.

"I thought we were saving that for tonight." Ziva said.

Lucas didn't answer.

"Lucas?" she wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his shoulder, he pulled away from her touch.

Ziva took a step back.

"What's wrong?"

"You should have gone home with him."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm leaving Ziva. It is obvious who you want to be with."

"Who?"

Lucas spun round, his eyes an angry red.

"Tony! I saw the way you looked at him! I saw the way you _kissed_him! I remember when you screamed his name…are those from him too?" he pointed angrily at the roses on the coffee table.

"Yes." She whispered, her heart thudding furiously in her chest.

"What about this?" he thrust an unopened home pregnancy test into hands.

"You went through my things!" Ziva exclaimed suddenly angry.

"Is it even mine!" he yelled.

"I have not even opened it!" she screamed back, throwing the box at him. "Not that that thing will tell me whose it is anyway."

"So you did sleep with him?"

"Yes, once, before I met you."

"That's what they all say. And can we talk about the fact that we look quite a bit alike?"

"That has nothing to do with anything!"

"I wanted to _marry _you Ziva! I thought I had finally found the one! **You only wanted a toy!** You wanted Tony, you've always wanted _Tony_. When you said 'I love you' you were thinking of him, weren't you? When we _fucked,_ that's who you were thinking of, not me." Lucas' face swam in front of her and she clutched at the counter to keep herself from falling. She saw him take a bag from the lounge room and storm towards the door and then the ground rushed up to meet her.

Ziva didn't even twitch as the roar of an engine blared out of the car park.

Her phone rang… and rang… and rang… and rang… and stopped. Her mobile buzzed in her bag and played _Luck be a lady_, her ring tone for Tony, she didn't pick up. She just lay on the floor, swimming in and out of conciseness.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: In my defense, I woke up at noon today, I promise I will post stuff tomorrow. And Ziva crying in the last chapter was written by CrazyNinjaChicks, though I feel like it's accurate, just keep reading :)**

* * *

Tony cursed as his call went through to voicemail.

Something was definitely wrong with Ziva. He grabbed his keys and bolted to his car.

He drove the familiar route to Ziva's apartment. From the parking lot he could see a thin sliver of light coming from the open door of her apartment.

"Shit." He cursed and sprinted to her home.

"Ziva!" he yelled as he climbed the stairs two at a time, disgruntled residents opened their windows and scolded him but he took no notice. "Ziva!" he flew through the open door to find her lifeless on the tiles of her kitchen.

"Ziva! Ziva… Zi come on, please, no." he muttered as her rolled her over into his lap and cleared her gorgeous hair from her face. She groaned softly and her eyes fluttered open.

"Tony?"

"Yeah Sweet cheeks I'm here."

"He is gone." She choked, "Lucas left."

Tony held her close and checked her over.

"Are you hurt?"

"No… it is your fault." She sat up and slid off of his lap.

"What?"

"It is your fault that he left." She cried as she stood shakily.

"Ziva… hey."

"Go away Tony! I do not want to see you here again!"

"Ziva wait a minute!"

"GET OUT!" she screamed. Tony left, not because she yelled, because he was afraid of what she would do to him if he did not.

NCIS

"What an awful Valentines Day." Tony groaned. He had not wanted to leave Ziva by herself after he had found her on floor but he would have been a part of the carpet if he had stayed.

There was of course a second best… Gibbs.

He called the land line but all he got was the recorded, robotic female voice say that the number was unavailable.

He rang his mobile but it just rang out.

"Oh yeah… ex-wife," he remembered.

He slumped down on his lounge in his untidy living room.

"I should really clean this place." He mumbled, "I don't feel like it." He put in half heartedly. He closed his eyes and sighed into his hands. He let his hands down but kept his eyes closed. He soon fell asleep.

The phone rang and Tony fell off the lounge onto a pizza box and an empty long neck.

He swore loudly as he was woken up and scrambled groggily to answer his phone.

"Tony DiNozzo, who until recently has never felt the sting of rejection."

"Tony?" a soft foreign voice replied.

"Ziva."

"Tony I am really sorry I-." Tony cut her off.

"Ziva are you alright?"

"I am fine Tony… I was wondering if maybe I could come to your place."

"Yeah… yeah sure… but I don't want you driving."

"Tony I am fine."

"No you're not! You collapsed on your kitchen floor Ziva."

"So?"

"So I am coming to get you. I'll be there soon." And he hung up.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I have no excuse for not posting yesterday, I just go lazy, but I did have to work today. And from now on this is my own writing, as in have have to think think of all this, so don't expect daily updates from now on, but I will try to post often (once or twice a week)**

**A new chapter for The Bucket List should be up later, and maybe one for Talking About Mistakes, that one kinda depends on how active the plot bunnies are.**

**Oh yeah, and I don't own any of the characters, even Lucas**

* * *

"It is open," Ziva called when someone knocked on the door. She heard the door open and close, and various locks being turned, before Tony appeared in the living room a moment later.

"Why is you door unlocked? You never leave your door unlocked. You must really be sick," he rambled as he came to sit next to her on the couch.

"I am not sick, Tony," she muttered softly, looking down at what ever was in her lap.

"Is that…" he started but for some reason couldn't bring himself to actually say it. She nodded anyway, obviously knowing where he was going.

"Are you…" he trailed off again. She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face.

"I'm pregnant, Tony," she sobbed.

"That's great, Ziva. I-"

"It is not great! This is horrible. I cannot have a child, nor do I want one." Her hands flew to cover her face, the pregnancy test falling into her lap. Tony watched her for a second before slowly moving closer to her and wrapping his arm around her shoulder, holding her body to his. She welcomed him and curled into a little ball in his lap.

"It's okay, Ziva, everything is going to be okay," he tried soothing her, running his hand lightly up and down her arm.

"Tony," she mumbled a minute later.

"Yes?" She sat up and looked him in the eye before continuing.

"I- I think you are the father." He stared at her, trying to process what she had just said.

"I- but how?"

"Well you see, when two people love each other ver-"

"I know that," he cut her off. "But how do you know it's not Lu- that other guy."

"We always used a condom."

"And we didn't," he said softly, but then started yelling. "Why didn't you make me use a condom, Ziva?"

"I did not think about it. I was so caught up in the moment… I was so caught up in you," she mumbled softly.

"That's not a bad thing, Ziva."

"Yes it is," she exploded, sitting up so quickly that her head almost hit his chin. He fell back against the couch as she glared at him.

"Why?" he asked after a second.

"Because… because it is," she tried.

"You let your guard down and you don't like that," he filled in.

"Why are you coming up with excuses for me," she snapped, crossing her arms over her chest and closing him off.

"I'm trying to make you see how ridiculous you sound. You let somebody, me, in, and it scared you. I'm not going to hurt you, Ziva. I want to help you, and I will, it doesn't matter how much you push me away."

"Why?" she asked, lowering her arms.

"Because I love you, and I don't want you leave you."

"You love me?" she whispered. He nodded slowly, never taking his eyes off of her. "Why?"

"To tell you the truth, I have no idea. There is just something about you that keeps me coming back for more even if I know eventually it's going to land me in the hospital." He could see tears gathering in her eyes, and he waited until one fell before reaching out and gently whipping it away with his thumb. He let his hand linger, cupping her cheek lightly and he could have sworn she leaned into his touch.

"Ziva?" he asked a moment later and she blinked a few times before holding his gaze. "Can I kiss you?" She hesitated for a second but eventually nodded. He never broke eye contact with her as he leaned towards. He felt and heard her breathing quicken as he grew closer to her face and he paused as their noses touched.

"Just say if you want me to stop," he whispered before closing the gap between them and capturing her mouth with his. His eyes fluttered shut at the feel of her soft lips pressed against his.

_Damn, I've got to do this more often,_ Tony thought.

She watched him, her eyes wide open and she could tell his mind was racing. She felt his tongue slowly trace her bottom lip, and even though she knew it was a bad idea, she let him in. She couldn't stifle the groan that fell from her lips as his tongue slid against hers. His other hand landed on her upper thigh as he shifted his body so he was now hovering over her and her back was pressed into the couch.

"Tony," she gasped as he shifted them so she was lying lengthwise on the couch and he was balanced above her, one of his knees in between hers.

"Just say the word and I'll stop," he muttered. Her only response was to wind her fingers through his hair and pull him even harder against him. He smiled as the hand that had been on her face slowly trailed down her torso and then back up, but this time under the fabric of her shirt. She had changed after he had left her, out of her work clothes and into shorts and a t-shirt. One of his t-shirts he now realized.

"Where did you get this?" he asked as he pulled back, tugging at the clothing article in question.

"I stole it," she deadpanned, pulling his mouth back to hers.

"What…did…he-who-must-not-be-named…think of it?" he asked in between kisses.

"He hated it… he knew…it was yours." Tony smirked before pulling the shirt over her head.

"Well now you're mine too." He knew he shouldn't have said that as soon as it left his mouth, but she only smiled up at him.

"Sure took you long enough." He laughed before wrapping one arm around her back and grabbing her upper thigh with the other as he picked her up. Her tongue clashed with his once more as he slowly walked them to her bedroom.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked as he gently placed her on the edge of the bed. She bit her lip but nodded.

"This isn't just another one night stand?" She nodded again in reassurance.

"I- I cannot do this on my own," she said, her hand coming to rest on her bare stomach. "I need someone who I know will not give up on me to help. Someone I love." He could tell the last words were strained and knew that it was hard for her to get them out.

"Then I'm your man," he affirmed, his mouth against hers again as he moved her further back onto the bed. He kissed her slowly, more passionately, as she worked at the buttons on his dress shirt. That was soon pushed from his shoulders, his undershirt following before her hands went to his belt. Those then joined the growing pile on the floor along with her shorts.

"You are so beautiful, Ziva David," he muttered, kissing her stomach as he eased her panties off. She tried to thank him but the only sound that left her lips was a gasp as he pressed him wet lips to the inside of her thigh.

"A little more to the left," she directed, gripping his hair as she pulled him closer to where she wanted him. But he bypassed that spot and crawled up the bed so they were face to face once more.

"Later, right now I want to do this correctly."

"Okay," she nodded and watched as he rid himself of his boxers before easing his weight back on top of her. He kissed her slowly, calmly, as he slid himself into her.

"Ziva," he moaned, his head falling onto her shoulder. "So much better." She smiled before pushing her hips up into him. He moaned again and pushed against her, making her groan, before pulling back, making her whimper.

And groan.

And whimper.

He kept going until the sounds became so mixed that he couldn't tell the difference between the two, until they became one noise that he could only describe as _Ziva._

And groan then whimper.

"Tony," she cried, her nails griping his shoulder blades as if they were the only thing keeping her grounded.

"I love those sounds you're making, Ziva. I wanna hear you when you come though. I want to make you feel so good."

"It is so good," she groaned in reassurance as her hips pushed up into him, her heels pressing into his back, bringing him closer.

"I love you so much, Ziva," he muttered, turning his head to the side and gently kissing her neck.

"Tony," she suddenly cried, her eyes growing wide before rolling back into her head. He smiled and gave a few more thrusts before following her over that wonderful edge of pleasure.

He moaned, his arms shaking as he used all of what little strength was left in him as he tried to keep his weight off of the beautiful woman below him.

"I do not mind," she whispered, her eyes not even open. "You make me feel… safe."

"You're welcome," he said, relaxing his muscles as he became her blanket. He nestled his face in her unruly hair, breathing in her unique scent. "You smell good," he mumbled against the hot skin of her neck.

"Do I smell like you?" she joked, gently stroking his arm.

"No, but I'll make sure you do before the night is over." He lifted his head and looked down at her for a second before bending slightly, pressing his lips to hers.

The kiss was slow and sweet, and full of love. It was in that moment that Ziva knew she had finally done something right in her life.

"I love you," Ziva muttered as Tony leaned her forehead against hers.

"I know," he chuckled, kissing her again before rolling off of her. She instantly missed his warmth, so she followed him, bumping into his side and curling around him, one of her legs going in between his.

"So," she started after a minute of silence, "when are you going to make me smell like you?"


	13. Chapter 13

chapter13

"Tony!"

"I'm coming," he called back from the kitchen.

"You said that five minutes ago."

"Well the stupid jar wouldn't open." He walked into the living room with a plate of apple slices and a dish of caramel. "And it was more like one." He handed her the plate before falling onto the couch next to her. "What do you want to watch?" he asked, grabbing the remote from her lap and turning the television on.

"What ever you want," she shrugged, shoving a caramel covered apple into her mouth, barely making it.

"You couldn't have picked a neater craving?" he joked.

"If I had a say in it I would have chosen something healthier, too."

"Like me?" he asked, smiling.

"No, you are not healthy," she countered. "You are like an addiction I cannot get over, not that I want to."

"Thank you… I think."

"I love being addicted to you," she muttered as she slid her now empty plate onto the table before climbing into Tony's lap, arms around his neck and both legs to one side.

"Well I'm glad to fulfill your needs," he said, leaning forward until their faces were less then an inch apart.

"I think I am starting to feel withdrawals," she murmured in a quiet voice, her eyes fluttering shut.

"Maybe I can help with that." He watched her for another second before closing the gap between them and pressing his mouth to hers, sucking her bottom lip between his teeth before pushing his tongue into her mouth. She moaned, shifting so their bodies were pressed more firmly together and raking her fingers through his hair. His hand had just begun the journey to the inside of her thigh when there was a loud knock on the door.

"No," Ziva groaned, pulling away from Tony and padding barefoot to the door.

"Oh no."

"What?" Tony asked, coming to join her. She slowly opened the door, as if the person on the other side might attack her.

"Ziva?" Lucas asked, peering in through the half opened door.

"What are you doing here?" she shot back, her voice angry.

"I left one of my jackets here."

"That was almost three months ago, why are you only getting it now?" Tony put in, walking up behind Ziva and into the other man's line of vision.

"It took me this long to get up the nerve to come over here. You wanna tell me why _he's_ here?" He directed his question at Ziva but his thumb at Tony.

"He is my boyfriend - I live here," they both said at the same time.

"I see it didn't take too long for you to bounce back, but then again you never really were invested in our relationship."

"Hey," Tony snapped, stepping forward so Ziva was behind him.

"And then there's you," Lucas exclaimed. "Tell me, did you knock her up while we were dating, or was it 'before'?" he made little air quotes with his hands before crossing his arms over his chest again.

"It was one time on New Years," Ziva tried to explain, but Lucas still didn't seem to buy it.

"And let me guess, you didn't wear a condom." The two men continued their staring contest, but Tony could feel his resolve quickly leaving him. "Jackass," Lucas muttered under his breath.

"Oh, and you're the perfect saint of sex?" Tony shot back at him.

"Did you tell him?" Lucas directed his question at Ziva.

"Tell me what?"

"It broke," Ziva mumbled.

"What broke?"

"The condom, during the first week we were dating."

"So this may or may not be my child." Tony concluded after a second. Slowly but surely, Ziva nodded. "Then why did you tell me you were certain it is my child?"

"Because I am, I can feel it. I know, somehow, that this is your child."

"Could just be kicking," Tony muttered.

"I want a paternity test," Lucas cut in suddenly. "I have the right to know if that's my kid."

"I also have the right to arrest you," Tony said, "but we're not going to do either of those things."

"No, Tony, it's fine, I will take the test. _Alone,_" she added after a second. "Lucas take your jacket and go home. I will call you later."

"Fine, but you better call," he threatened before grabbing his sweatshirt and stomping back down the hallway.

"Are you really going to go?" Tony asked as she walked down the hallway towards the bedroom.

"Yes, Tony. Do you not want to know for certain?"

"I trust your gut, and the little guy kicking around in there."

"It could be a girl," she corrected, emerging back into the hall wearing more public worthy clothes.

"Oh yes, because you wanted to be surprised. Abby really didn't like it when you told her that."

"I know. I will be back in an hour or so," she told him before standing on her tiptoes and pecking him on the lips

"You know I love you no matter what, right?" he asked, kissing her again before opening the front door.

"I know."


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: hey, I know it has been a little while, I'm sorry, but work has been a little crazy along with life in general. But here is another chapter, I like feed back and where you want this story to go :)**

**Oh, and for those of you who thought that it was too soon for Ziva to get a paternity test, go back to the part where Lucas is there, it's been three months since they broke up, so she's about five months along now.**

* * *

Tony sighed and sat down on the couch, then got up again a second later and paced back and forth for a second before he walked to the bedroom.

"How long have you been wearing a whole in the floor with your pacing?" came Ziva's voice from the entrance hall.

"You're back!" he yelled, running to the door and enveloping her in a hug that even Abby would be proud of.

"Wow, it has only been less then two hours," she laughed into his chest.

"How did it go?" he asked, leading her back to the couch.

"Fine, but now I have a question for you."

"What?"

"Would you rather be called _Dad _or _Papa_?"

"I'm the father?" he gasped.

"You doubted my instinct?" she questioned, raising her eyebrows.

"No, of course not, never," he tried to reassure.

"Good, now I have to go call he-who-must-not-be-named," she told him as she made to stand.

"No, let me do it," Tony said, grabbing her wrist. "You don't have to talk to that bastard. He's nothing but trash."

"You know I chose him because he reminds me of you," she laughed.

"Was it my striking good looks or my wonderful personal personality that drew you to him?" he joked, grabbing her far leg and pulling her flush up against him.

"Mostly the looks, because no one could replicate your personality."

"I know, I'm one of a kind," he smiled and leaned his head towards her.

"Well…"

"You shush," he ordered before sealing his mouth over hers. Her phone chose that very minute to start ringing, making the two reluctantly break apart so she could answer it.

"_Did you get the results yet?_ Ziva opened her mouth to answer but Tony grabbed the phone from her before she could say a word.

"_Yes, and you're not the father so leave her alone. You're no longer part of her life_," Tony basically yelled into the phone before slamming it shut.

"You did not have to be so harsh," Ziva mumbled.

"Yes I did, because he is not part of your life and he has no say in what you do-"

"Neither do you," she interrupted.

"I'm sorry, Ziva, I'm not trying to control you," Tony assured when he saw the way she was looking at him. "I just want you to be safe. And you to be safe." He bent over and gently kissed her stomach, making her laugh.

"I know," she whispered as he stood back up.

"I saw the way that guy treated you, and I just want to protect you from creeps like him."

"And you can, just do not try to keep me in a plastic bubble." She took both of his hands in hers and made him look her in the eyes.

"Okay," he smiled and kissed her before leading her to the dinning room.

"Now sit, I made dinner."

"Is it something more fancy then boxed macaroni and cheese?" she joked as he pulled a pan from the oven.

"Yeah, ha ha, very funny," he fake laughed as he plated up their meals. She watched him as he poured something over the food before grabbing both plates and bringing them to the table.

"Chicken alfredo with broccoli and peppers," he said as he set the plate in front of her.

"Wow, you cooked this?" she asked, picking up her fork and stirring the food around before stabbing some of the pasta and chicken onto her fork. "Yum," she hummed as it hit her tongue.

"And you doubted me," Tony scoffed, grabbing his own fork.

"No, of course not, never," she laughed, throwing his own words back at him. They finished their dinner in silence before heading back to the couch.

"We never got to watch that movie," he pointed out as Ziva curled up into a ball with her head resting on his lap.

"You can still watch whatever you want," she shrugged. "I am not in the mood for anything special."

"Good because wipeout is on," he laughed.

"Ugh, why do you like this show so much, it is discriminating. And how can these people not tell when they are about to get hit in the face?"

"Stop over thinking it, Ziva. It's supposed to make you laugh," he encouraged before resting his hand on her side.

"Saw that coming," she muttered a second later when a woman got smacked in the face by a very obvious obstacle.

"Shush," he hushed her, lightly tapping her side. His fingers continued to dance across her waist, happy when he felt her shirt ride up slightly, granting him with access to her soft skin.

"Tony that tickles," she said half mindedly. "Tony!" she shirked as his fingers dug into her side. She curled away from his wanting fingers, pushing her back into his stomach and the couch. "Tony stop," she pleaded through her laughs.

"See, this is how you enjoy yourself," he smiled and pulled her into his lap, much in the same way they had been earlier before they were interrupted. His fingers continued to glide skillfully across her skin as he attached his mouth to her neck.

"Don't stop, Tony," she groaned, her forehead falling onto his shoulder while he continued his sweet torture. She gripped his shirt like a lifeline as his tongue darted out to taste her skin, drawing what she could have sworn was a heart before he pulled her earlobe between his teeth. "Don't stop," she repeated, pulling her body closer to his and threading her fingers through his hair.

Tony really wished that what he heard next was just part of his imagination, but it wasn't. So reluctantly he got up, still holding Ziva, and shuffled over to the door.

"Did I interrupt something?" Abby asked, her tone somewhere between sorry and curious.

"Yes," Tony growled, letting Ziva down.

"I'm surprised you can still lift her, Tony," Abby said as she followed Ziva into the apartment.

"Abby!" Tony scolded.

"It's okay, Tony. I am pregnant and going to gain weight, it's inevitable."

"I know that, but she was doubting my strength." He flexed his arms to prove his point.

"What are you here, Abby?" Ziva asked, turning her attention to her friend.

"Why did you go to that clinic?" she blurted out.

"How did you know I went there?"

"I, um, well, I tagged your name in a search so every time you use your credit card or your name is logged somewhere I know," she shrugged hoping she didn't sound too desperate. "So why'd you go?"

"Lucas came over and demanded a paternity test," Tony filled in when Ziva didn't say anything.

"Can he do that?" Abby gasped.

"If he has a valid reason to believe that he is the father, then yes," Tony nodded.

"And did he?"

"Yes," Ziva answered quickly. "But everything is okay, because Tony is the father."


	15. Chapter 15 Epilogue

**A/N: Hello lovely people who choose to read this story, I am sorry to report that this will be the last chapter. I didn't really plan it that way, not that I really plan out any of my stories, it just seemed to work out best that way. Read and enjoy :) and review, I like those too**

* * *

"_DiNozzo,_" Tony answered, putting the phone to his ear.

"_Tony,_" came Ziva's breathless voice.

"_Hey, babe, what's up?_" Tony wedged his phone between his ear and his shoulder as he began shuffle through some files on his desk.

"_Baby,_" she gasped.

"_Yes, Baby?"_

"_Not me baby, baby-baby."_

"_What?"_

"_Tony, get your ass over here and bring me to the hospital!"_ she yelled into the phone, loud enough to make both Gibbs and McGee look up.

"_Kay, I'll be there in a minute,_" he said before promptly hanging up. "Boss-"

"I got it, DiNozzo. Go." Tony nodded and grabbed his bag before running to the elevator just as someone else stepped off of it.

"Come on, come on, come on," he mumbled, impatiently tapping his foot as the elevator brought him down to the ground floor much to slow for his liking. He was out the doors before they had fully opened and running towards his car, flashing his badge at anyone who got in his way. He was about five blocks from their apartment when his cell phone started ringing again.

"_I'm almost there,_" he said, not even looking at the caller ID.

"_Almost where?" _an all to familiar voice asked.

"_Dad?"_

"_The one and only,_" was the chuckled response.

"_Why are you calling, Dad?"_

"_I'm heading into D.C. tomorrow and I was wondering if you could pick me up at the airport."_

"_Ah, sorry, Dad, but I kinda already a really important commitment."_

"_What could be more important then your father?"_ Tony cringed as he realized there was no way out of this.

"_One sec,_" he said, throwing his phone into the passenger seat as he pulled the car into an opened spot.

"How's becoming a father for an excuse?" he asked as he ran up the steps, not wanting to wait for the elevator.

"_What do you mean?" _He couldn't tell if his father was annoyed or worried.

"_My girlfriend just went into labor,_" Tony tried to explain as he fumbled with his keys. He was just about to try one in the lock when the door was yanked opened, reveling a very flustered looking Ziva.

"What the hell took you so long?" she gasped as he wrapped one arm around her waist, grabbing the go bag she was holding with his other.

"Here, can you explain to my father why I can't pick him up tomorrow?" he handed her the phone while they quickly walked down the hallway.

"_Hello, Anthony,_" she panted into the speaker.

"_Ziva? I thought Tony was on his way to pick up his girlfriend."_

"_He is- he did."_ She covered the phone with her hand and look up at Tony. "You didn't tell him we were dating?" she hissed at him.

"Kinda slipped my mind."

"Slipped your mi- oh god," she gasped and clutched at her belly. Tony promptly jabbed at the elevator button before grabbing the phone from her.

"_I'll call you back later, Dad."_

"_Junior I-"_ but Tony cut him off before he could finish.

"It's okay, Ziva, just breath," Tony tried to sooth as they rode down to the bottom floor.

"Can't you make this damn thing go any faster," she yelled, leaning against him for support.

"Um, let me try. Hey Mr. Elevator, could you go a little faster please, we're kinda in a hurry." He paused. "Sorry didn't work."

"Aw, Tony you are not helping," she gasped, just as the doors dinged open.

"Here we are, let's go." He quickly ushered her outside and into his idling car before running around to the driver's side and pulling away from the curb.

"Just breath, we're almost there," he said, reaching over to take her hand. She sucked in a deep breath as he rounded a sharp corner, earning more then one annoyed horn in return.

"Please do not get us killed, Tony."

"I know, sorry." He slowed a little as he took the next left. They pulled up in front of the hospital in the next ten minutes and Tony quickly helped Ziva up out of the car.

"Hi, how can I help you?" a nurse at the desk asked at the sound of the door opening, though she didn't look up from what ever she was doing.

"Can we get some help please?" Tony asked, raising his eyebrows.

"With what- oh," she gasped when she finally looked up. "Stacy can we get a wheelchair?" she called down the hallway. Another young woman came jogging down the hallway pushing a wheelchair and Ziva dropped into it just as the woman stopped next to her.

"Take her to room seven," the first nurse instructed.

"Am I allowed to join her?" Tony called as he chased after Ziva.

"Of course. Here." She grabbed a pair of scrubs off a shelf as she passed it and handed them to Tony. "Put those on and stay out of the way." She swerved around another nurse pushing a gurney before turning into a vacant room.

"Can you help?" she turned to Tony, who quickly looped and arm under Ziva's shoulders and helped her stand, moving her to the bed.

{{NCIS}}

"Hurry up, Timmy," Abby squealed, prancing into the ER, her platform shoes making odd clomping noises on the floor. "Where is Ziva David?" she asked the nurse at the desk.

"Room seven," she answered after flipping through a few papers.

"Thank you," Abby chimed before running off down the hall in search of her friends, McGee in tow. Abby had the curtsey to knock on the door before pushing it open, giving Ziva just enough time to pull her shirt down.

"I'm so sorry we took so long but Gibbs wouldn't let us leave until we finished the case and then Timmy made me wait for him." She paused and took a breath before stepping forward. "How are you doing, Ziva?" Ziva couldn't hold her laughter in anymore.

"Abby," she gasped, gently rocking her now crying baby back in forth in her arms. "If you had asked that question two days ago I probably would have killed you. But I am much better now." She smiled and looked down at the small child in her arms, who had since stopped crying and was now grabbing blindly at the collar of her shirt.

"Can I hold her?" Abby asked, reaching out but then immediately pulling her arms back.

"Of course," Ziva let out another small laugh and held up her arms so Abby could take the baby.

"Hi there," Abby cooed.

"Her name is Ariah," Tony said, standing from the chair he had been sitting in.

"Hi, Ariah," McGee smiled and held up his finger for the baby to grab onto. "How did you come up with that name?"

"It means _air_ in Italian," Ziva answered.

"And _lion_ in Hebrew," Tony continued.

"I think she's still hungry," Abby said suddenly. Ziva looked over at her friend to see her trying to pull the baby away from her chest.

"You kinda did interrupt her meal," Tony shrugged.

"Well I could use some food too," McGee said. "Come on, Abby. You wanna come too, Tony?"

"You can go, Tony," Ziva said when she sensed his hesitance to leave her.

"Thanks, we'll be back soon," he assured, giving her a quick kiss before running after the other two.

{{NCIS}}

_Eighteen Years Later_

"Are you sure you are ready?" Ziva asked for the fiftieth time that morning, straightening her daughter's gown.

"Yes, now stop it," Ariah swatted her mother's hand away and reached to the counter to grab her car keys.

"I thought you were going to drive with us," Ziva said, sounding hurt.

"We're not all going to fit in your car. I was going to ride with you and Dad while Sophia and Carter took my car." The girl shrugged and tossed the keys to her sister, who was sitting on the couch with Carter.

"Sophia just got her license, are you sure you want her driving your car?"

"You taught her to drive," Ariah argued, heading to the bathroom to fix her hair.

"That is why I am worried," Ziva yelled after her.

"Relax, Mom," Sophia said, "it's not like Dad taught me."

"I heard that," came Tony's disembodied voice from down the hall. He appeared a second later, walking down the hall and pulling a large bouquet of flowers from the closet.

"Go put these in what ever car your sister isn't in," he instructed the two children, who nodded and quickly ran out the door with the flowers. He sighed as he watched them go before turning to Ziva.

"What's wrong?" she asked, looping her arms around his neck as he stopped in front of her.

"They're all growing up so fast. I don't know what happened to my little kids."

"You still have time," she tried to reassure him.

"How much though? Carter is going to be in High School next year, Ariah College, and Sophia is going to be a senior and she'll only be seventeen."

"Do you remember that night, nineteen years ago, in Abby's lab when we made Ariah?"

"It's kinda hard to forget," he laughed.

"They are not going to leave you like I did, they are going to come back because they need you, though maybe not in the same way I do." She smiled before standing on her tiptoes and kissing him.

"I think I can live with that, as long as you keep coming back that is."

* * *

**A/N: if you're wondering what happened to Senior, just think about all the other times he called/ visited.**

**Thank you for reading and check out my other stories if you're still bored and looking for something to read :)**


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